Remember when you were a kid learning how to ice skate? I always remember I used to count how many times I fell over the course of an excursion. As long as it was less than the last time - I considered it a step of progress; I was on my way to mastering ice skating. I've never done that with running. Oh, maybe that's because I've been running since I was 2 or 3 years old. I guess I figured by now that it's a skill well enough mastered that falling really isn't an issue any more. I mean, I count is as my profession these days for cryin' out loud. Seems like a fair assessment, right?
Well guess what, people - on yesterday's run the fall count was one. I rolled my ankle and went down pretty hard. Aside from some scrapes on my hands, I've got a baseball where my ankle used to be. Well actually, that was yesterday - today the swelling has come down.
In any case, spring has come and--as usual--I'm on the injured list. GGGRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I really can't express my frustration. Especially as this injury comes days before I fly out to Denver for a pretty intense training camp. I'm 100% at God's mercy that I'd be healed in time for the trip.
If I'm really honest about what's going through my head right now, I'd say that my frustration is actually mixed with a bit of guilt, and a bit of relief. Guilt that I haven't been the most disciplined athlete the last week and a half as it was anyway, and now I feel like I'm falling even deeper into a hole on the fitness front. And relieved that I've got some time away from training, because I've felt pretty unmotivated ever since a disappointing race at Clermont. That, in turn makes me feel a little more guilt about the fact that I should be more resilient mentally and emotionally when I have a tough race, or a tough week of training. I guess you could say, in general, I'm feeling a bit down about the whole ordeal.
The silver lining, and I would say perhaps, God's design for this little incident is to remind me that my success, my strength, my purpose, my joy in this sport are all rooted in Him. With such a great winter of training, I know I've lost sight of that. Sure, this is a minor set back on the season, but instead I'm calling it a slightly less than gentle nudge back to a life appropriately centered about my Savior. I cannot do what I've set out to achieve without a heart devoted to giving praise to my God. Triathlon is how I praise Him, and I suppose if I forget that, then for me, it's really not worth doing. (Also, I suppose I should look forward to a few more sprained ankles... ;-) )